There is nothing in your history that God can't use.
Perhaps some of the things you are recovering from will be used to release others if you will allow the Lord to use them.
Moses was dead. God called the son of one of Moses' servants and appointed him to lead the Israelites into the Promised Land. Who was Joshua? An unknown until he obeyed the Lord. God promised Joshua amazing things, but the conditions were absolute obedience and the refusing of distraction.
Joshua was to be strong, confident and courageous. These qualities come only when the foot is lifted to take the next step.
Soldier of The Cross, this is a new season.
Tell Him you will be fixed on Him and not the assignment.
Tell Him aloud.
Look up and move on!